Your daughter has just announced that she’s getting married. Congratulations! There’s a wedding in your future. The day your daughter weds a man or woman and begins her married life brings a tear to many a mom’s eye. As excited as you may be to start making all the arrangements, there are at least two important things to keep in mind:
- It’s your daughter’s wedding, not yours. She’ll have ideas and plans of her own.
- You want to enjoy the party, too. If you take over the planning you won’t have time to do that.
Nevertheless, there are some responsibilities that the mother of the bride customarily shoulders for the wedding.
- Help make the guest list for the bride and work with their fiancee’s family on its guest list
- Help your daughter select her dress (and possibly the bridesmaid’s dresses)
- Find your dress as soon as possible, consult and co-ordinate with the groom/bride’s mother
- Scout out and visit potential event locations with your daughter
- Help document gifts and givers
- Attend bridal shower(s) and possibly host one
- Listen to your daughter’s hopes, frustrations, triumphs and disasters
- Offer praise, congratulations and loving support as needed
On the big day, you’ll be one of the people your daughter turns to when she needs help getting ready. Some attendants may call on you for assistance, too. Get yourself dressed and coiffed with plenty of time to spare so you’ll be available to help when necessary. Unless you walk your daughter down the aisle, you’ll be the last person seated for the ceremony. The mother of the bride is the official hostess of the reception. It’s your job, along with other important family members, to greet and welcome guests. But your most important responsibility of the day is to enjoy the occasion, congratulating the happy couple on their beautiful wedding and new life together.
PS: I’ll let you know how I did as “Mother of the Bride” after my daughter Karen gets married to Tyler this September…